I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
