break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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