new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
