And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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