I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
