Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
