I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
