Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
