you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
