is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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