I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize