Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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