the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
