i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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