New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
