we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
pray to the hookup gods
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
