You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
