I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
either way he was missing a nipple.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
