i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
