Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
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