I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Terrible idea I love it
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
