So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
