with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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