We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
