My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
