I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
