I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm passing your future prison.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I supernannyed him into submission
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
