I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize