i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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