3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
