It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
