I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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