Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My friends, they love my intelligence
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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