i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize