I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
