Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize