The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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