ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
