shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
