Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Randomize
