she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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