i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
