Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
