is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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