Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
