I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
