There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
