have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
