Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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