I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
